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the NT partner does not have a developmental disorder.This article focuses on the situation for the normally (NT) functioning spouse.Romance is often the very thing that can be lacking from the sexual side of the relationship and this can, in time, have a detrimental effect upon the quality, ore willingness of either partner to participate in making love.
Asperger’s Syndrome seriously affects the sexual intimacy and life in the relationship and often causes great emotional pain for the neurotypical (NT) partner.
The functional disorders that are a result of the autism, characterize precisely the core areas which are most important for a person’s healthy and safe sexual development, especially the development of an intimate physical, emotional and social contact with other people.
They are developmentally delayed in Theory of Mind abilities (Baron-Cohen 1995).
This will adversely affect the development of the important relationship skills of empathy, trust, and the ability to repair someone’s emotions and share thoughts and responsibilities (Attwood 2004).
These are some of the confusing scenarios which arise regularly in NT/ASD marriages.
Many NT-AS marriages seem to quickly become celibate.
We also recognize problems with empathy, limited conflict resolution skills, an inclination to criticize and rarely compliment, and a tendency to show little interest in their friend’s experiences and emotions.
Some individuals with AS can be very robotic or technically perfect in bed without paying attention to their partner’s need for an emotional connection and foreplay before intercourse.
In her research on sex in NT-AS relationships Maxine Aston found that fifty per cent of the couples reported, that there was no sexual activity within their relationship.
”In fact, there was no affection or tactile expression whatsoever.
On the other hand, sexual demands may be so high as to drive the other partner to distraction, leaving him or her little time for rest or respite.